Really, really short on words. T is away, as in has-left-the-country away, and I am suffering.
But somewhere, away from the Hallmark cards, away from the boasting facebook posts and the adverts on TV, I need to say ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ to the person who has truly mothered me. Who rebuilt me, who is watching me grow, walking alongside me the whole way.
Thank you for reading me stories when I am scared.
Thank you for the steady, calm beat of your heart; an anchor for me when I am adrift in a sea of fear.
Thank you for wrapping me up in your warmth, when I am so cold.
Thank you for always having my future in your eyes, even when I am only able to see the past.
Thank you for helping me find a connection with my real mother – for working relentlessly, so that now I am in a place to send her a Mother’s Day card that I mean.
Thank you for never being afraid to sit cross legged and play with toys with me.
Thank you for telling me about the beauty you see in the world – about the sun, stars and moon – and letting me be part of your joy.
Thank you for teaching me the spectrum of emotions, and letting me try them out in your room!
Thank you for being brave and honest enough to show your emotions, even when they are painful for me to hear.
Thank you for teaching me the permanence of care. That love is not conditional, no matter what I’ve been taught.
Thank you for your unconditional care. Your ‘no matter what’.
Thank you. Always.